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An A to Z guide to finding your joy in writing

A is for the author (you!)
Pen tucked behind your ear:
Let’s use your gift to make them laugh, 
Get mad, or shed a tear. 
B is for the books you’ll write, 
Your creative spirit, fed.
The story’s waiting, time to start;
It’s anxious to be read!
C — the cover. This is where
The first impression’s made. 
There’s nothing quite like walking past
And seeing it displayed. 
D is for the dream — your book!
Just flying off the shelves. 
The Today Show calls, you ditch your sweats
And stay in chic hotels. 
E is for the editing 
All kinds of writers do
We tweak the scenes and add a twist
But adverbs we eschew. 
Etymology tells us
How fun words got their start
It says “eschew” is rarely used
And that just breaks my heart. 
F is where the fun begins
With author friends we meet.
We understand the highs and lows, 
Elation, and cold feet. 
G, the girl who dreamed of writing
Books like ones she’d read. 
Though she’s grown up, you’ve filled her cup;
She’s cheering in your head. 
H is for the happy ending
Readers will expect
We’d rue the day we ended on
A teaser for effect.
Idioms are useful tools
To help you turn a phrase.
Euphemisms mask taboo,
And others are clichés. 
J is for the jokes, dark humor,
Slapstick, and satire.
Make them laugh and they’ll come back
(Unless they are a crier). 
K is for the k*ll*ng off
Of our protagonist
It’s the bravest choice when faced
with writing the plot twist.
L, the lazy afternoons 
Spent in our writing chair
Our laptop open, music on, 
And cheese dust in our hair. 
Mmhmm… it’s time to talk about 
The subject we avoid. 
If money keeps your muse inspired,
She’s bound to be annoyed.
N is for the naughty books
She’s penned in her fake name.
Regardless how we use our gift,
To waste it is a shame. 
Oh the ostentatious voice
That wants to preen and crow
Unless you’re writing research grants,
Save it for Thoreau. 
P is for the sneaky twist
That lurks within the plot.
We find new ways to make them doubt
What’s true… and what is not. 
Q: Let’s quickly talk about 
Their thoughts and rhetoric. 
Italicize or not? Who knows!
“She wondered” does the trick.
R is for the rhythmic prose 
That pulls the reader in. 
If we write it well, they’ll have to 
Run the wash again. 
Style is individual,
Unique as DNA. 
What you might write as comedy,
Is someone’s tragic play. 
Titles set the scene for what
The story is about.
They proudly sit and spin a tale
That’s short but full of clout. 
Underwhelming, trite, or ugly 
Words need not apply. 
When we can paint a picture of a man
With words like spry. 
V is for the very late nights 
Spent behind a screen. 
It’s half past four, I’ll write one more,
Please, someone intervene!
W is “why” we write
When nothing else makes sense.
Or when we’re bored and dream up monsters
Hiding in our vents. 
Xtra words (and letters) should 
Get tossed into the street.
We’re like the bouncer in a club
Of words with giant feet. 
You and I are not the same,
But this is surely true:
The words we use can build a bridge
From you to me to you. 
Z is for the zeal and zen
That writing can provide. 
But please don’t make me spell zucchini (I did it!)
Although… I’ll eat it fried. 
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